Greetings to all Zimagal readers! I am Pasionara, an obstinate, sensual Mediterranean brunette with a penchant for living a slightly unusual life. Unlike the late Boomers/early Generation Xers with whom I chronologically identify, I don’t care much for sporting designer label sneakers, monitoring technology stocks, or kissing butt in corporate America. Instead, I would rather be at the wheel of my ancient but still functional automobile, negotiating the twists and turns in the road while the radio blares Sonic Youth, not knowing exactly where I’m going but having a hell of a good time getting there. I am passionate about being passionate, as passion is a trait that is as admirable as it is appalling.

You may wonder where I got my name. Well, La Pasionara was a Mexican freedom fighter during the Mexico/US altercations back a hundred years or so ago. She was the Mexican Mata Hari, so to speak, a woman of intrigue who cast aside society’s expectations in favor of living deeply and fighting for her beliefs. Like her, I have spent my life in active pursuit of freedom, denying denial and consistently, quietly, practicing subversion. (Unlike my namesake, however, I have never withstood gunfire.) I have had fifteen lovers, including men from three continents, an upstanding married citizen, a mortician, a bartender, a TV personality, and a borderline psychotic. My ex-husband was the model for Julia Roberts’ insane spouse in Sleeping With The Enemy; I left before I became a mashed potato. I don't apologize for any of it. I’ve travelled all over the world, and yet feel most at home in the proletariat insanity that is Baltimore. These days, I currently wander the earth, looking for clues and listening to the words of the people I find most real.

I begin my conversation with you by offering a few declarative statements, some truths according to Pasionara. And yes, we could have a long and sweaty discourse about the nature of truth…is your truth truer than mine? Well, dear readers, I am the columnist here. So, it will be my version of truth that you read. You are free to argue with me, of course. I love a good argument.

• Sexual experimentation is underrated. Sexual preoccupation is overrated.
• Home ownership is a myth perpetrated to get folks like you to become upstanding, tax-paying citizens.
• Purple foods rule.
• Finding a Tommy Hilfiger shirt at Goodwill feels like a coup d’etat.
• Yellow nail polish has a curative effect on the wearer.
• I’m still an Orioles fan, no matter how many opposing teams beat up on them.
• I hate when strange men send me instant messages that say "HOW R U?" Spell the words out, damn you. Make those four extra keystrokes! What makes you think you can seduce me when you’re clearly a stingy dork?
• AOL keeps many people from having real lives. It has created real lives for others.
• Lattes, martinis, and cranberry juice cocktails. One of each per day will keep you sane and healthy.
• The inventor of MIDI music should be drawn and quartered.
• The sexiest part of a man is his brain. Guys, that’s in the big head, not the little one.
• People commit many racist acts every day without even thinking about it.
• If Bill Clinton had wanted me to give him head, I might have done it.
• Anais Nin, Marguerite Duras, Louise Erdrich, Barbara Kingsolver. NOT Danielle Steel, Jackie Collins, John Grisham, and the Venus/Mars guy.
• Keeping a daily journal is cheaper and more cathartic than seeing a psychotherapist.
• Having one or more conspiracy theories means that you at least spend some time in thought.

• If you haven’t traveled, how do you know what you have is so good?
• Isn’t it amazing that health insurance companies will pay for Viagra when they won’t pay for birth control pills?
• How can people ignore the poverty and desperation of others?

As you can see, I am an opinionated lil’ cuss. I also do tarot readings, offer love and diet advice, and will plot with you to overthrow Saddam Hussein. Do write to me at pasionara@aol.com and share with me your innermost, id-like thoughts. I love getting e-mail, especially if it is not grammatically challenged. See you next month!