Not to sound biased, but I am of the opinion that parakeets make excellent pets for people in apartments or who are too busy to walk a dog or make countless trips to a veterinarian for shots, worming, and general grooming. Parakeets, or Budgies as we are also known, are entertaining creatures. We love bells and other toys; we also like chewing on the book you're reading, as well as your tax forms, grocery lists, and random Post-It Notes that might be hanging around. We also love to make an assortment of sounds - and not just the standard "chirp," "tweet," and "squawk," although we do that too! And You Thought Only Parrots Could Talk! If so inclined, a parakeet can develop a large vocabulary of human speech and other sounds. I love to chatter, and have a fairly large vocabulary for a young bird. I started to talk at about five months, and haven't stopped since! The first phrase I said was, "good boy," and have added many more to my repertoire. Some of my favorite things to say are: Good boy Crazy bird Oops Hiccup (the word) or hiccup! (the sound) Pickled Kathy (said in my human's Dad's voice) I love you Hi! Hello (sounds of laughter with or without a snort) (beep) electronic phone hang-up sound (sound of soda bottle opening) (sound of phone being placed in cradle) Kiss kisses (kissing noises) I see your butt! Bite me! Whatcha doin?, alternately What are you doing? Whatcha got? Goodnight Ok, bye A'ight (contraction for "all right," as used by Andree) Poopy and Poop (throat clearing) Cuervo Baby How are you? Stop that. Often I combine words to make new phrases. Just recently I shocked my human by saying, "I see your big bird." Sometimes I just say things like, "hello, baby, crazy crazy bird." I guess that means I talk to myself! If you think that's bad, I've got humans talking like me. My human ends most phone conversations with, "ok, ok, a'ight, ok, bye (boop!)" Maybe that's because I say that all the while she is chatting, just to give her the hint to pay attention to ME! The best way to get us to speak is to raise us alone. That is, without a mirror or another bird. This way, we fall in love with our mistress or master, and want to spend all of our time playing with him or her. Kathy put my cage on her desk at home. Being self-employed, she had plenty of opportunity to bond with me. After she hand-tamed me, I was comfortable with hopping around on her desk, "helping" her with the computer, and of course, pooping on everything. At the moment, I am dictating this article while sitting on her hand. She claims I make it difficult to type when I do this, but I am only trying to make myself useful. Parakeets most easily learn things that are said emphatically. For this reason, it's probably best not to curse in front of your pet, unless you want him or her to say "fuck you!" to you and and your guests. I learned "crazy bird" this way. I like to buzz whomever is sitting at the keyboard and paying attention to a stupid computer monitor and not to me. I did this once too many times to Kathy's friend Andree, who yelled, "stop that, crazy bird!" Within a few weeks, that was my favorite new phrase. I think that's also the way I learned the word "poop." Sometimes being a parakeet is a demanding job. At Christmastime, I was required to entertain a dozen humans. All desperately needed hair-grooming attention and general finger-sitting. I flew from head to head and back again all evening, every once in a while saying something. I was accused of not making very good conversation that night, but I was too busy to talk much. I did do a little muttering under my breath, which the humans mistook for "chirping." Actually, I speak quietly to get attention - when I say something, immediately the room quiets down and everyone looks at me. I revel in the spotlight! Occasionally I reward the silent observers with a phrase or two. But only if I feel like it. Speaking of Christmas, that was about the time I was born, back in '97. I was given to my human by another human, a male friend whose parakeet she watched over the holidays. Kathy so enjoyed that little critter's company so much, her friend decided she needed one of her very own. That was me. I was just a tiny thing then, scared, and unsure of my sexuality. Kathy was pretty sure I was a boy though, because the top of my beak was just starting to show the faintest hint of blue. Well, she was right about that - I am all man! (Not that anyone but me can tell though :)) The bird that Kathy used to watch was named Fruit Loop, and she was female. She didn't have a very large vocabulary, but she was very tame and loved to shoulder sit and fly around the room. She died shortly after her last stay at Kathy's. Her behavior had been a tad stranger than usual that year, and with good reason: she had a tumor growing in her stomach and she must have been in pain. Kathy thinks of her often and wishes something could have been done to help her; however, nobody knew she was sick. I never met her personally, just saw her in brief passing, but am grateful that she cultivated Kathy's love of birds. As I sit here on Kathy's head, contemplating life, I think that maybe some other Web sites might give you more insight into parakeets (and other birds as pets) than I can on my own, so here is a list of links: Budgie Place The American Budgerigar Society Blue Chip Exhibition Budgerigar Society The Baby Budgie Home Page Vlegels the Talking Budgie Budgerigars! Lots of Great Budgie Links! Budgie Bytes I hope you have enjoyed our little visit. If you have a budgie or another talking bird, and would like to share some of its vocabulary with the rest of the world, please e-mail me at cuervo@theminx.com and I'll try to talk Kathy into including you in a future issue!

Boys and Girls How does one tell a boy parakeet from a girl parakeet? It's fairly obvious, actually. No, you don't turn the bird upside down! There is a colored part just above the beak called the cere. If the cere is blue, the bird is male; if it's pink, then the bird is female. On young birds, it's difficult to determine one way or the other, as the cere is usually rather pinkish. Once mature, identification is easy. Parakeet Colors/Varieties Cuervo is an Australian sky-blue pied. There are far more varieties available than the yellow-green one is used to seeing in pet stores. Below is a list of some parakeet colors. The "normal" keets have a black wavy design on their backs and heads. They come in the following colors: Sky Blue --> Cobalt Mauve Gray Light Green Dark Green Olive Green Gray Green Then come the Cinnamons. They have a brown wavy design and slightly browner plumage than the "normals". They come in basically the same colors: Sky Blue Cinnamon Yellowface Cobalt Cinnamon Gray Cinnamon Light Green Cinnamon Dark Green Cinnamon Gray Green Cinnamon and so on...there are also Opalines, Spangles, Inos and Black-eyed Clears, Yellowfaces, and Pieds. Our friend Fruit Loop was a yellow black-eyed Clear.

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